today i am just going to blab. nothing special.

palmer leaves in exactly four weeks, for 730 days.
im going to miss him. i already miss him and he hasnt even left yet. my heart already hurts. i don't think i am prepared for all the tears that are going to come. i don't think i am quite ready to watch my mom bawl her eyes out. im just got strong enough to deal with all of this. im scared to be honest. i know palmer is doing the right thing but im going to miss him like crazy. ugh i think im stressed out.

my dad burped today i said "dad that was disgusting" my dad said "thanks i learn from the best." and that's true, i do burp quite a lot. you could say im a man. its okay there is no shame, im almost proud that i can beat most guys in a burping contest. i do love my daddy, he is the best.

thursdee night i went to temple square for young womens. i walked into the visitors center and lo and behold i saw a group of down syndrome teenagers preparing to sing christmas carols. they were all matching and all had pretty red flowers on their shirts. as i saw them my jaw fell open and i let out a long "awwww." i love handicapt people so much. their show was just about to begin and i was so excited to hear them sing. once they started singing i honestly couldn't help but shed a few tears. it was the sweetest thing ive ever heard. the second words start coming out of their mouths the spirit hit me like a ton of bricks. handicapt people have the sweetest spirits, and i can feel it when im around them. well to say the least, that was the highlight of my week.

jordan, the kid i peer tutor. is so amazing. i get choked up sometimes when i think about him. some days i feel like they don't really remember me. like im only a girl that comes into class every once in a while. sometimes i feel like he doesn't even know who i am. but the other day they called a girl  named Leah to the front office. and since my name kinda sounds like Leah, Jordan thought they had called me to the front office. as i walked into class jordan said "whats your last name? because i think they just called you to the front office." it made me smile so big because that proved that he knows who i am, he can put my name with a face and he remembers me. it also shows that he cares about me and looks out for me because he wanted to let me know that i might have been called to the office. even though it really wasn't me that had to go to the office, at least jordan thought about me. it makes me so happy that he knows who i really am and he knows my name and he remembers me. gosh you guys i love peer tutor so much.

palmer and his 5 room mates are coming over for dinner tonight. its going to be fun. plus two of them are from texas, if you know what i mean. were going to have a good time. plus 5 boys from BYU can't be bad looking either ;)

can i get a hoorah for getting all my christmas shopping done? usually i dont do it until the week before christmas but ive really been on a roll this month. no more procrastination, i got it all done. and let me just tell you it feels great to have it out of the way and not have to worry about it for the rest of the month. now its time to relax... err i mean time to stress out and have anxiety.

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