im in a mood

i think too much, sometimes i get so wrapped up in my thoughts that i make myself mad.
i like to think im a simple girl, but in reality im far from simple.
im not as tough as i act, and i actually do have feelings. im tired of acting like nothing bothers me.
i pay attention to little details, and will remember things you said or did years ago. i remember mean things people said to me in elementary school. i do not forget.
i hate sitting home by myself, yet i do nothing to change it.
i keep waiting for college to come, so i can sweep high school under the mat. pretend that these years never happened, and move away from home. i know college will bring a fresh slate, as well as fresh faces. i know i cant keep waiting for college to get here, i have to learn to be happy now.
im tired of this blog. im tired of sharing my feelings on here because everything i say, comes back to bite me in the butt. whether if its my family, friends or random people from school. for some reason i thought this blog was for me.  but nope, i cant say a thing without being judged and it causing problems in my life. so im probably going private.

alright, life, im tired of you being so boring.
im a girl who likes to have fun, who likes to laugh and who likes adventure.
and for a long time, you've been none of that. i desperately need change.

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